1.30.2010

American Taliban strikes again.

 
Anne Frank, not just an author, a growing girl with natural concerns about her body.


 
Anne Frank, as you are aware, documented the waning moments of her life in her diary. There is much stuff in there that is painful to read: from the loss of her home, her family, uncertainties over the war, the nature of God, and the meaning of life. Also, in the expanded version produced in 1995, Anne was -like most developing adolescents- concerned with the changes her body was going through. There is one passage, in particular, that has the Puritans up in arms:

There are little folds of skin all over the place, you can hardly find it. The little hole underneath is so terribly small that I simply can't imagine how a man can get in there, let alone how a whole baby can get out!


Wow, pretty graphic stuff huh. you'd think that this would be a teaching moment for kids reading this book; an opportunity to discuss adolescence, and growth, and change. But, that would be too even-handed. The better result, according to the Culpepper (Va.) School district is as predictable as it is pathetic. Just ban the whole damned thing



 
Make it a double...



This Superintendent, who apparently is unaware of the definition of irony, had this to say 
“I’m happy when parents get involved with these things because it lets me know that they are really looking and have their kids’ best interest (in mind). And that’s where good parenting and good teaching comes in.”
And, that was really my point above. Good parenting, and good teaching, are holistic. Children are not well-served by lying to them, banning materials from them, and -for Chrissakes- denying them one of the fundamental lessons they need to hear, namely that they are not alone...


Hell, we knew this...even back in 1957. 


Dad is simultaneously hilarious and creepy.
And, ladies, don't forget to do your hair and nails and wear your prettiest dress, but -for the love of god- No Square-Dancing!!





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Posters on the wall...

NB: This post is best viewed while listening to this....

 


Let's see, I've given you memories of school lunches, and shred musicians,  and even my childhood fantasies (here and here); so I think it's time to talk about posters. Like most kids, growing up I had a lot, a helluva' lot of posters on the wall. I'm not sure what got me thinking about these, but I'll show you mine if you show me yours:


 
Remember this? Those with a musical memory extending before 1992, knows that these guys at one point did not suck. I said it yesterday, and I'll say it again: I miss Cliff.




 

Pretty much the sweetest thing that Nintendo ever put out back in the day: certainly on par with Metroid, Kid Icarus and Zelda.





 
 Mock Lita Ford you want to...That is a sweet guitar; and she is an awesome musician. Besides, my love of big hair is well-documented at this point.





 
Old school Christina Applegate. This was my favorite one ever. And count the win here: eagle, big hair, tight leather, sideboob, snakes, torn jeans, JFL. I loved this, and it fueled my adolescent mind at all hours of the day. Come to think of it, I love it even more in retrospect!




 
 
Probably my favorite album for about 3 years...Sigh, too bad the Cavalera brothers split apart. In their defense, Soulfly is pretty sweet though.




 

The first time I heard this album, with stereo fully cranked, it was terrifying. Sheer absolute death metal, and one of the heaviest albums, start to finish, ever.





 
But THIS, this was my favorite band. Kinda heavy, kinda' goofy, comic books and Stephen King out yang, and proudest bearers of the the "thrash" label...between the billion posters, equally numerous t-shirts and all the CDs and concert releases, I kept these guys afloat in the Alabama demographic. But this was my favorite Anthrax album and poster.





 
I loved the Batman; still do. No superpowers, just superhuman grudge-holding; that's something we can all get behind. And, Frank Miller was, and remains, my god.



 
So, there you have it; these are the big ones I remember best. The 80s and 90s really did rock the hell out of the aughts, that's for damned sure. Excuse me now, while I go crank up "I am the law" and make my neighbors happy with me.





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Saturday has a treat for you...

This is awesome: a Generation X live performance of "Kiss Me Deadly" and some interviews interwoven throughout. 
You might recognize Billy Idol up there. While Gen X is generally considered part of the London punk scene, I've always thought of them more as part of the larger proto-punk movement (Stooges, MC5, Buzzcocks, etc.). Anyway, this is a hell of a ride, and the sound and vid quality is excellent as well.





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1.29.2010

Final shilling for the week.

So, Hear the World, now has a Twitter feed and a Facebook page....And, no, I'm not whoring. I just appreciate the work, and the ear, required for such a monumental undertaking. And you should too...




 
Looks stout and fascistic... what could go wrong?
So, ummm, yea. What are you waiting for?





Also, for those interested in purchasing yesterday's Dža ili Bu album, HERE's how.



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Warning: Viewing this may impregnate you from afar...

Despite the post earlier this week entitled, "Sublime", I think it's safe to say, that there may actually be no greater awesome in the universe than this....I love the internet.




 
Yes, that is John-freakin-Waters autographing a tattooed stripper's ample rumpus.
 This picture has the power to impregnate Bearodactyls.






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TGIF: Time for a classic.

This song emphatically neither requires, nor needs A) an introduction, or B) friggin' orchestral parts. I miss Cliff.





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1.28.2010

This is so gay, but I love it....

Jesus-y, yes. But beautiful it remains...
And, FWIW: This is my personal motto. You get one, and but one, spin on this world. Enjoy. Look forward when you can, enjoy the present as it comes, and relish the past as it arises...





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You people don't know what you're missing....


Dža ili Bu, a Serbian punk nightmare straight out of Euro-/Hellcat psychobilly hell, proudly gives you this track "Opasne Igre". This comes via Nico's wonderful international music blog, "Hear the World". 

Go now, peasants, or do I have to get the strappado and flagrum out again?

 

 

 

 

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Admiral Akbar knows it's a trap...

And, so should should you, dumbass...




That's a fully operational Death Star....


To be fair, she set him up; but, to be equally fair, he is a real, real big ole' dumbass. 



Gotta love this dumbassery. Nevertheless, with the level of "trust", these two had, this wasn't going anywhere. But, if it did, we know where it would have headed: to the wonderful world of alimony, child support, and Billy drinking, sobbing, quietly in his mom's basement.







State of Our Disunion.

From BigFatWhale.com, an excellent liberal/left cartoon, comes the following posted last night in anticipation of President Obama's State of the Union address...



Vince Offer just might take you up on that...


You can look at it several ways. 1. probably harsh words for the new Corporate-acracy we are left with the wake of last week's SCOTUS ruling (and he did); 2. Promises for what we, as a people need (health care, jobs, etc)...and he did ; 3. or, if you're more cynical, just more old hope-peddling...and, yes, the Republicans went there, as well. BUT....




Trying here, guys...


No matter what though, and despite my desire to turn my back on all things politic, I just can't give up after a mere year. The problem here, people, is not the agenda; it's fucking Congress (especially the Senate) who have stymied the entire legislative agenda,  effectuated the most tremendous bait-n-switch on the American people I've ever seen in my lifetime...




Uh, yeah. Fuck these guys.


 Which brings me to my last point. No matter how dark things occasionally seem, you don't have to go very far back in time to realize that it is the dread of dread, the fear of fear, and the uncertainty which sew rancor and which will undo us. To become disaffected may be the goal of the military-police-corporate elite, but it's not American. And quitting is not, nor should be, in our collective makeup.


Confidence thrives on honesty, on honor, on the sacredness of obligations, on faithful protection and on unselfish performance. Without them it cannot live...And, when you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.




Thanks FDR, we needed those words...and people think Obama is glib with a phrase?





 

Thursday's sending a blessing...


The Netherland's "Nightwish", with -the now-departed, but no less god-like Tarja on vocals. This is one of the finest goth metal bands out there; and, as you can tell, very much served as the model for Evanescence. Unlike the latter, however, the former are A) better musicians, B) devoid of religious trappings, and C) don't suck.




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1.27.2010

NOT so clever dog....

This morning, I showed you the clever, clever dog. But, as you and I all know, there are some of our best friends who aren't so bright. Poor ole Lucky (best misnomer, evah1!1) is one such dummy....





BWAHAHAHAHAA





Demotivate Dump: Sexist Pig Edition

These have a theme, largely sexist in nature and/or prurient, but dammit, they are funny.



I would totally open it...



 

 I wonder if she's a hatchback...



 

This is funny if you know how many clothes I've ruined, and they're never mine....



 

This is actually true...



 

Then again, I think this is true too...




 

Just so, so wrong...



 

You're totally going to hell for laughing at this...




 

And this too....







Clever, clever animals...

What happens when mechanical engineers decide to remedy the age-old problem of the dog wanting to fetch at bad times? You get not only a really nifty, if decidedly geeky, dog toy but you also get a very clever dog sliding his way into the pocket protector realm of canines.


Just really clever, all the way around.
h/t Monkey




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Nice lyrics; goofy song...Story of my life.


This song made it to No. 1 in the UK. While I think the music is a bit goofy (and, since Owl City is from Minnesota, would you expect anything less), the lyrics are very interesting.




It's been a long time, a thousand miles, since I've seen this many fireflies.


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1.26.2010

Pardon, while I get my special towel....


Pretty much the hottest thing I've ever seen...
Bonus points for 1/2 empty Jack Daniels bottle, even if it is from Tennessee (being from alabama, we have a moratorium on all things "Vol" related. I am, of course, willing to rescind that proscription).
Excuse me now; me and Mr. Sock need a little alone time...






Hurts to breathe...

So much goddamned uncertainty; so much timidity; so much irrascability; so much recalcitrant digging-in; so many times telling myself...telling yourself, that it doesn't hurt. It does. It always has. It always will.


And. It hurts to breathe.




Time does not heal. Time only leaves scars...


What am I on about? A website called "So There", where people seek ultimate closure. It is life in all of its painful, rugged, rawness...and it hurts to even read. It will render you incapable of speech, of logical thought, and -in my case- the ability to breathe.



Excerpt? you say. Indeed:



I saw you last week, and all I can remember is staring into those beautiful brown eyes. I can still see the reason, why I fell in love with you. I fell in love with that wonderful personality of yours. I can tell you that look more beautiful than the last time I saw you.
I hope you learned to be a better person because of me. "The great blessing of mankind are within us and within our reach; but we shut our eyes, and like people in the dark, we fall afoul upon the very thing we search for, without finding it."-Seneca. I still believe, we still love each other. We all journey through life wondering what will become of us. "Life's a voyage that homeward bound"-Herman Melville. 
I continue to wonder if I did anything to push you away from me, and I cannot come up with a reason. "Happiness resides not in posessions and not in gold; the feeling of happiness dwells in the soul"-Democritus. "Words without thoughts to heaven go"-William Shakespare. 
These are the words, I am putting to paper. All I know is that it feels good to put my thoughts on paper. I continue on life's journey, and wonder what I will discover about life. My hope is I continue to be a better person. I am moving soon to another city to live. I hope that is letter reaches your hands, Yvette. I wish you well, and I hope you are well. 



Enjoy.





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Fun with drunk driving...

So, there's drunk driving, then there's "Holy shit, I should be dead". Out in Rapid City, South Dakota a woman was arrested on the eve of Christmas after her car had gone into the ditch. With the terrible weather in the Northern Plains, that doesn't always mean that you're drunk, but you could very well die if the cops can't get you out of the snow banks.




Now, imagine it's dark, subzero, winds creating a whiteout, you've got crappy cell reception, so you running the heater to stay alive...only problem is, the snow has blocked the exhaust. Killer.




When officers approached the vehicle, they discovered that she was passed out. Drunk. How drunk? So drunk that she set a state record, in a state that is in the top 5 for binge drinking.

 

A Sturgis woman had a blood-alcohol level of .708 percent, possibly a state record...Her blood-alcohol level was almost nine times South Dakota’s legal limit of .08 percent....a blood-alcohol level of .40 is considered a lethal dose for about 50 percent of the population. “Engle’s was almost double that,” Sondreal said.


Read that again: .708, almost 1% of her both was pure ethanol. That's not just drunk, that's not just a drinking problem, that's suicidal.




Makes a great shooter after your BAC hits, oh, .5 or .6



And now, only slightly tangential, stupid human tricks during the sobriety stop:




Sure it's from Reno 911, but it would still be funny if it happened.

Which, brings me this excuse to post a picture of lovely, awesome Clementine's phenomenal assets.




As if I needed one.






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Tuesday has had enough of Winter, thank you


Wumpscut's "Die in Winter"; musically, pretty dark (think Project Pitchfork), and electronic -dear god- how electronic. While I normally don't like cold, superprocessed tracks, it works for the theme and lyrics of this one. BTW: If you live in cold, grey places, WARNING: here there be suicide-grey skies....


Lyrics go now:

The time has come to close your eyes
Time has come to realize
Time has come for saddling down
Time has come in sleep to drown
From life from your life from life is this your life
From life this is your life from life this was your life
If you should die die in winter
If you should die die in winter
If you should die if you should die
Die in winter
Die in winter
Die in winter

The time has come to breathe no more
Time has come to see God's shore
Time has come to realize
Time has come to pay the price for life for your life
For life for your life for life this is your life
For life this was your life
If you should die die in winter
If you should die die in winter
If you should die if you should die
Die in winter
Die in winter
Die in winter

Come to me you are the chosen
You will see your eyes stay frozen
Black coffin waits for only a chance
To pick you up oh what a romance
In life in your life in your life once in your life
Once in your life this is your life this was your life this was your life
If you should die die in winter
If you should die die in winter
If you should die if you should die
Die in winter
Die in winter

In winter you will live on in people's mind
Though for a minute of mankind
Nature it dies in winter too
But will be awoken in contrast to you
If you should die die in winter
If you should die die in winter
If you should die if you should die
Die in winter
Die in winter
Die in winter
In winter



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1.25.2010

Life is ugly: Enjoy some beauty

Very ugly last week or so for me...Depressing news all the way around, and other assorted crap. So, no snark, or pith, just beauty on display for the next few images. God knows, with the ugliness of the world, a ray of light -in any form- is welcome.



 I love this. It reminds me of the 20s flapper girls, who were so elegant, and feminine and beautiful.



 

No explanation, the juxtaposition of the pale skin with the dark eyes, lips and nails makes this not just erotic, but pleasing to the eye.



 

There is nothing in nature that can rival the female form for pure beauty and subtlety and visual grace.








facepalm


Really? Really?
Why are Americans this intentionally fucking stupid?




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Sublime.

They say that a picture is/can be worth a thousand words. Yet, what is one to do when the picture itself is beyond words.

And, that is what I have found.

Sublime.

Exemplary.

Defying description.

Art.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the most awesome image ever created and shared on the interwebs.





wait for it....






wait for it...






Ready to be wowed?







You're welcome...






Monday has to get back in the saddle...


Sometimes, when life just keeps kicking you in the teeth, you've got to pick your ass up out of the dirt, dust yourself off, and climb back in the saddle. Success was never made with mopery.

And, you owe yourself the exquisite treat of seeing Boston's Aerosmith play live...just once. There are few better live acts ever. Even if old-school rock and roll isn't your bag, you'll remember it forever.





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1.24.2010

had a VERY VERY shitty day...Hasselhoff

Was gone with a client all day, a potentially lucrative one. However, if you can't trust your client, then you have nothing upon which to work...and no paycheck changes that. So, away the Shadow man runneth.

But, all is not lost....I needed cheering up, and I hunted down my very favorite awesomeness ever. Bow down before the Hoff


Why yes, air guitar frozen fish are dead sexy.



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Sunday has a new favorite song...


From VNV Nation's brilliant 2009 release, "Of Faith, Power & Glory" is this track, From my Hands. I could wax philosophic about this one, but the piano and vocals say it all. In the words of one commentator on YouTube: "Utterly heartbreaking, on some deeper, primal level. Or this one " I am in love with this song, it is just so perfect, what else to  say .." Or this one "Who would have thought that Ronan and Mark would grow like this." So yeah, pretty damned good song...


Lyrics go now:


So much I thought I'd have to say
Though I try to speak, my meaning strays.
We can't avoid the facts that brought us here.
I have come to say goodbye.

The lies I try to tell with my own eyes;
An act of pride, a willful compromise.
Please understand how torn I am
When I walk away from here.

I lament the moments we won't share.
If I am far too sentimental, I apologize.
Please understand this is who I am
And who I'll still be when I've walked away from here.

You know I'm not unkind
When I say in the future,
The past is just the past.

No going back,
No change of heart
But this is now,
Time will not differ.

My thoughts betray, so easily confess
How long I'll wait here after you have gone.
Nothing ends but I don't believe that now
Please don't walk away from here.

I went alone and I remember days.
Nothing will change a single fact of who you were to me
Oh, come what may, forever to the end
I find it so hard to let you go.

And hush now, let it go now
There's no need for sad goodbyes.
Hush now, let it go now
I know it's time to go.
Time to let this fall from my hands



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